Love Conquers All or Yes, there IS a Man on the Moon!

As a child, I learned to live with my Cerebral Palsy and learn to accept that I was different in a special way. My parents were very supportive and always encouraged me to succeed at anything I attempted no matter how difficult the task was.

As a teenager I learned to take criticism from my peers. Many of my supposed friends taunted me. Sometimes, it was just too difficult not to acknowledge their teasing. But that’s part of life.

I was in the seventh grade when I was diagnosed with Epilepsy. It was the oddest predicament that happened one day in math class. I was listening to the teacher and watching her intently in describing a mathematical equation. Next thing I knew, I was being reprimanded for not paying attention in class. I had no idea I blacked out or why. I withheld this information from my parents for several days until I had another blackout.

When I told my parents of these incidences, they were quite alarmed. Then I found myself taking medication some affliction I didn’t know I had or why I had it. I became very noncompliant in taking the drugs mainly because it wasn’t explained to me why I needed the to be treated with the medication. The pills I took, made me feel groggy and I had a hard time in concentrating. I would fall asleep in class during the day and at night would stay up trying to sleep.

Finally, I had enough! I had a family meeting with all the people concerned about me. I gave them all the symptoms of how I felt going into the blackout as well as coming out of one. I would ring my hands together, and/or would loose time and place of where I was. It was not unusual to see me angry with myself after I had a seizure even though I knew I couldn’t control them. It still angered me.

In the second year of college I was talking with my neurologist. I was quite upset that these seizures had not yet gone away. I asked him, "When will these seizures would go away?" The doctor said patiently, “As soon as you find someone who loves as you are, the seizures will go away.” I sure didn’t believe him. I replied, “Yeah, sure….. just like there is a man in the moon.”  This happened about two weeks before classes began.   

I met him in our psychology class. I had less seizures by that time. I was have a "spell" approximately every six months rather then a few per week. It was progress but,  I was afraid of telling Robbie that I had seizures and of how he would respond. Would he leave me? or would he accept me? that was the chance I had to take.  By Thanksgiving  I made a decision to tell him I had this malady. His reply, “I already know about it. I looked it up in the library and found an article linking the possibility of have seizures with Cerebral Palsy.

After Robbie acknowledgment  of siezure  disorder, he patiently held me and said, "I will always stand by you no matter what happens." He has demonstrated to me time and time again. One incident I remember well. He had to go to the finance office to cash a check. 

I said  to  him,  I'm having a bad day, May I come with you? While we were in the finance office I  must have put my head on his shoulder. The next thing I remember we were outside walking. I looked at Robbie and quizzically ask him, "Didn't you need to get some money?" Robbie replied, "I've already done it.....you had a "spell" while I made the transaction. That was the day I really knew he meant what he said about standing by me.  He replied to the clerk when she asked,  "Is she alright?" Robbie responded,  "Oh, she just has a headache and left with me."  

     Much later in life, I met up with a real friend from High School. She relayed the first occurrence of me having a seizure. The teacher was yelling at me to pay attention and I was not responding.  Diane was sitting in the next row beside me and noticed I didn't seem to hear anything.  I just had a blank stare. She yelled at the teacher saying, "Something is wrong with Marienne.  Shouldn't we get some help? Shortly after she asked that question, I came out of the absent seizure. I called them blackouts or spells.

My neurologist was right. I did meet my prince and we have been together for thirty-five years. To this day I still believe there is a man in the moon. Robbie became my prince of a husband in 1981.  We love each other very much.